Is he from the future?

– Jerry Seinfeld to Elaine

What do you get when you cross a speaking panel of Bob Costas, Bill James, Joe Posnanski and Gerald Early with a baseball-mad town in winter? A jam-packed Graham Chapel on the campus of Washington University in St. Louis. Although billed as a discussion on "The Future of Sports," we’d guess that the majority of the hungry crowd Monday night came to be served some baseball morsels from the Hot Stove, especially given the panel’s baseball-heavy reputations. However, we — along with the reportedly more than 500 other attendees — endured several non-baseball appetizer questions before moderator Michael MacCambridge dished up the baseball entree.

The banter at times could have been a live look-in on the filming of Ken Burns’s Baseball, with three two (how did Burns overlook James?!) of the speakers having appeared on the acclaimed documentary, and the other two with credentials to have done so. The panel was at its best when candidly relating personal anecdotes — Early’s childhood tales of the older black men at the barbershop talking sports — and jumping in to zing popular sports culture — Costas’s description of a televised poker player as a "clammy degenerate in a members-only jacket"; it was at its least enjoyable when parroting academy-approved, politically correct positions that would have been at home in a doctrinaire university lecture, such as Costas’s overwrought claim that Title IX was one of the most important social acts of our time.

After aplombly fielding questions on the potential of professional womens’ sports, the prognosis for boxing and the fate of a college football championship, the panel fielded some baseball questions. In particular, in addressing the problem of baseball being too slow, the speakers weighed in with answers ranging from the philosophical to the practical. James asserted that "It’s an easy problem to solve — if you acknowledge the need to solve it." Costas noted that the pace of baseball is to be "leisurely, not lethargic" and that the game in its current state runs "contrary to the metabolism of culture." He offered that calling the high strike would speed things up. Posnanski and James had a different and curious concern: That the rule allowing a team to change pitchers in the middle of a game has been perverted and that baseball could and should restrict late-inning pitching changes. That prompted some agreement from Costas, who offered that relief pitchers change the narrative of the game: Whereas once viewers enjoyed the struggle between a tiring pitcher like Bob Gibson having to face Willie Stargell for the fourth time in a game, today’s fans don’t have that continuity throughout a game. Citing evidence that we’re able to process information more quickly and multitask, Early ventured that Americans’ shortening attention spans means a problem for baseball.

James good-naturedly answered a question from the audience about the impact and currency of sabermetrics in the mainstream media, noting that it was "clear that Felix [Hernandez] wouldn’t have won [the AL Cy Young award] without the knowledge revolution." Given that Posnanski had recently blogged about how Hernandez’s award didn’t prove anything about sabermetrics, we thought that the topic would produce a fun debate, but neither party enjoined the argument. (We showed last year that the trend away from wins to strikeouts has been going on for several years now.)

Some other baseball-related commentary:

• James on baseball’s future: Despite the high barrier to entry, MLB is vulnerable to an outside league starting up if it promises a better product, such as 90-minute games. Costas’s counter: Any new league would suffer from lack of history.
• James on the possibility of an MLB salary cap in next five years: "0% chance"
• James on instant replay: He would rather build an electronic system that allows umpires to make the right call the first time, such as a green light indicator for close plays at first base.
• Posnanski on whether changes to the game make it better or worse: Baseball is best — perfect — when you’re 10 years old. After that, it can only become less perfect. Early agreed, and took the idea further to say that when you’re young, you don’t care about or at least have a hard time appreciating history. He related an anecdote about going to the barbershop with his dad and hearing the older men talk about Jackie Robinson and Satchel Paige. "I didn’t care who those old guys were!" Funny to hear a man so well-known for his writings on race in America to admit to an adolescent apathy about the great groundbreaking players of the game.
• James on whether it’s ever okay to manage by gut: Yes, if for no other reason than to avoid being predictable. But stats don’t always offer a clear decision (e.g., when to sac bunt).
• James on the future of lacrosse (question from a member of the audience wearing a Yankees cap): Lacrosse needs better stats.

We had a chance to buttonhole James (and Posnanski — both were gracious and affable) afterward for some one-on-one questions (some from the Twitterverse). He is already on Twitter, though he claims he’s still figuring out how to use it (along with other gadgets), and he didn’t offer any ideas for the future of sabermetrics. When we asked him which was the next market inefficiency that teams could exploit this offseason, he dryly suggested "just watch what the [post-Minaya] Mets do." We inquired whether any major-league GMs still put stock in stuff like pitcher wins and losses; to our astonishment, he indicated yes, and that they were hardly a rarity. As he then said, old ideas die hard. Indeed, Bill, indeed.

[Related: Video (forum), Video (Q and A)]

An infielder’s glove isn’t the only new thing that Cardinal second baseman Skip Schumaker will be trying on for the 2009 season. On Wednesday morning, Schumaker announced that he’s going to play the upcoming season under the name “Cinco Cinco.”

“I figured that, with the new position and all, why not change the name, too?” Schumaker said. “It’s a whole new me.”

Schumaker acknowledged that the unconventional moniker, Spanish for each of the digits in his uniform number, would be strange at first for fans but noted that it wouldn’t be without its benefits on the team.

“Sometimes in the dugout it gets confusing, people saying ‘Skip’ and meaning [manager] Tony [La Russa]. So I’m going with Cinco Cinco. It’s just easier.”

Schumaker follows in the footsteps of the Cincinnati Bengals’ Ocho Cinco, formerly known as Chad Johnson, who changed his name to his uniform number — 85 — last season.

“Hey, it worked for, you know, what’s his name — that guy who plays wide receiver for the Bengals.”

Schumaker informed the team of his decision yesterday, and the club has already issued a set of revised jerseys.

“‘Mo’ [GM John Mozeliak] understood. I’ve kind of had an identity issue all my life, honestly,” said Schumaker, whose birth name is Jared Michael. “My family and people who don’t know me call me ‘Jared’ and fans call me ‘Skip,’ so this simplifies things. All they have to do is look at my jersey and remember the Spanish word for five.”

Cinco Cinco figures to bat numero uno on opening day and play position quattro for the first time in his major league career. The Cardinals and manager Tony La Russa are just hoping he can avoid a sombrero.

“I’m going to write in number 55 at the top of my lineup card, so it works either way for me,” said Tony La Russa, now the team’s sole Skip. La Russa noted that he’s already planning to rename several of his pets with Spanish numbers.

Teammate and Dominican Republic native Albert Pujols accepts the new name.

“It’s funny that a guy with a Swedish [Schumaker is actually German] name would want to change to a Spanish one,” said Albert Pujols. “But as long as he doesn’t change it to El Hombre, I don’t judge, you know what I’m saying, mang?”

Upon hearing Schumaker’s announcement, MLB commissioner Bud Selig issued a statement Wednesday morning, saying, “Baseball isn’t just America’s game, anymore. Cinco Cinco’s bold decision shows how far we’ve come in reaching out to global markets. We’re doing a lot to diversify the fan base. I’m very proud of that.”

The Beaumont boys — Earl Weaver, Lee Thomas and Chuck Diering — highlighted another delightful Bob Broeg Chapter Hot Stove Meeting this past Saturday at Mike Shannon’s Restaurant in downtown St. Louis. The evening featured the panel of the trio of Beaumont High School graduates as well as presentations from local baseball luminaries Mike Girsch, Director of Player Development for the St. Louis Cardinals, and Dan O’Neill, columnist from the St. Louis Post-Dispatch (view all photos)

As of September 1998, Beaumont High School in St. Louis had no fewer than 15 major league players and one major-league manager, the most of any high school, according to Baseball Digest:

• Bobby Mattick
• Pete Reiser
• Buddy Blattner
• Chuck Diering
• Jack Maguire
• Bobby Hofman
• Jim Goodwin
• Roy Sievers
• Don Mueller
• Earl Weaver
• Bob Wiesler
• Neal Hertweck
• Lloyd Merritt
• Lee Thomas
• Bill Pleis
• Bob Miller
• Roy Branch

Weaver (1948), Thomas (1954) and Diering (1941) all reminisced about their playing days at Beaumont, and Weaver and Thomas traced their success back to their coach, Mr. Elliot. Weaver showed that, while he’s getting older, he’s still got some moxie, mixing in zingers about former umpires and his fellow panelists alike.

Before the Beaumont boys began, Girsch continued in the tradition of Cardinal decision-makers appearing at the Hot Stove, providing insight into his work analyzing data and creating sytems for the team to be able to better assess players. Following Jeff Luhnow in 2006 and John Mozeliak in 2007, the sabermetrics-friendly Girsch similarly demonstrated in his appearance that the team is in competent hands in the player-development side of the business.

O’Neill graciously previewed the DVD version of his new book "Sportsman’s Park," which he narrated a la John Chancellor in Ken Burns’s Baseball. The video had many restored images of the old park, as well as players and St. Louis scenes that were part of the life of the venerable ballyard, home to the most games in major-league history.

As usual, Bob Tiemann stumped the audience with trivia, like "Both Billy Southworth and Earl Weaver had their final minor-league managing stint working for which club?" (Rochester) and "What six different major-league teams, tied for the 20th-century record, did Dick Williams manage?" (California, Boston, Oakland, San Diego, Seattle, Montreal). The meeting also marked the end of chapter president Norm Richards’s term and the beginning of Jim Rygelski’s. Thanks, Norm, for many tremendous years at the helm.

In an effort to counter his waning performance against lefthanded pitchers, Jim Edmonds will begin 2007 as a switch-hitter.

After stepping into the left side of the batter’s box in 6896 plate appearances in 14 major-league seasons, the Cardinal centerfielder will bat righthanded against lefthanded pitchers this season. His first test will be against future Hall of Famer Tom Glavine as the Cardinals host the Mets in the season opener tonight.

"Tommy’s gotten the better of me over the years," said Edmonds, who has a paltry .586 OPS in 24 plate appearances against Glavine. "But I’m hoping that I can see his changeup better from the right side. I can’t be much worse [batting righthanded]."

The move will undoubtedly come as a surprise to many, considering that Edmonds — presumably — missed most of camp recovering from offseason surgery and has had only 13 plate appearances this spring. But to get experience batting righthanded, Edmonds has actually spent most of spring training playing under a pseudonym in various minor-league games and on the back diamonds at camp. He never once appeared righthanded as “himself,” even as late as Saturday night’s Civil Rights Game, in which he batted left against Cleveland southpaw Jeremy Sowers. The centerfielder was able to keep his secret training under wraps by wearing a fake beard to conceal his identity.

"Tony thought it’d be best if the word didn’t get around the league about my experiment," Edmonds said. "The surgery was a natural excuse, but since I’m a fairly recognizable, good-looking guy, I needed a disguise." Edmonds says he contacted former Mets manager Bobby Valentine, who once famously returned to a game in a groucho-style disguise after being ejected. "Bobby’s a little more straight and narrow now that he’s been in Japan. But he turned me onto a costume guy in Osaka, and he hooked me up."

The Cardinals were initially skeptical when Edmonds — who became convinced of the benefits of a platoon advantage after a chance meeting with sabermetrician Sean Forman at a Las Vegas casino — approached them with the idea back in January. But after looking at Edmonds’s career splits, the team gave Edmonds the green light, on the condition that he train under the tutelage of special instructor Bunny Mick, who worked with former Cardinal outfielder Vince Coleman in 1989 to improve his pitch selection and bunting. After several attempts to reach Mick went unanswered, the team was informed that Mick had died Sept. 14, 2005. That’s when Cardinal manager Tony La Russa stepped in and suggested his former player Walt Weiss, who as a switch-hitting shortstop for La Russa’s Oakland A’s was equally inept from both sides of the plate.

La Russa sounded an optimistic note on his new weapon.

"Personally, I’m proud of him taking this step at this point in his career," La Russa said. "From a manager’s perspective, it gives me options, at least. There were times last year when I wished I could’ve pinch-hit for him, but with whom — Belliard, Vizcaino? Please."

Cardinal fans will recall another spring attempt at switch-hitting, that of Bo Hart in 2005. Hart ultimately gave up his left-handed swing and was non-tendered later that year. Edmonds, however, isn’t worried about a similar fate.

"Totally different, totally," explained Edmonds. "I just have to remember to take my righthanded bat up there with me, and I’ll be fine."

In chapter business, SABRen Steve Gietschier provided an update on the convention committee, which needs a deep bench to field the estimated 700+ attendees this Summer. The luncheon speaker will be the legendary Joe Garagiola, but if that isn’t enough to entice you to come, Gietschier announced that none other than Ben Jones — “Cooter” from Dukes of Hazzard — will be performing his one-man play, “Ol’ Diz,” about Cardinal pitcher Dizzy Dean. That in itself may be worth the price of admission.  … By the way, ongoing kudos to Joan Thomas and Barb Sheinbein for their efforts on the Ballpark Marker Committee, which has now garnered funding for two more markers … The chapter honored Sheinbein with its Meritorious Service award Saturday, well-deserved.

Former Cardinal player and current SWIC coach Fiala led off for the speakers, and, for a guy with all of five at-bats and one hit (which, as he reminded Ron Jacober, was one more hit than he had) in the majors, has some interesting career twists and trivia. He was the Cubs’ third-baseman in the Thomas Ian Nicholas vehicle “Rookie of the Year” (which also had Barry Bonds, Bobby Bonilla and Pedro Guerrero), and therefore has an IMDB page — how many ballplayers can claim that? Fiala, as trivia buffs — like SABRen Jim Rygelski — will note, was one of only three players (along with Joe Edelen and Doug Bair, the others in the trade) to play for both of the teams with the best overall records in 1981, neither of which went to the playoffs … The Cardinals drafted the future University of Illinois baseball coach one round before they drafted future University of Illinois basketball coach “Lonnie” Kruger. In that draft the Vianney grad was drafted ahead of future Hall of Famer Paul Molitor (by the Cardinals, of course) … Fiala joked that he indirectly helped the 1982 Cardinals win the championship by getting traded for Doug Bair, who had a 20.6 VORP for the 1982 team (3rd-best) … And speaking of contributing to Cardinal championships, Fiala coached current Cardinal Scott Spiezio at U of I. Fiala recalled encouraging Spiezio to practice multiple infield positions, “because you never know where you might end up playing someday.”

We’ll always remember Ron Jacober — appearance-wise, anyway — from his TV days doing sports for the news and weekend Cardinal games on KSDK back in the ’80s. While the man has aged, naturally, his never-aging voice sounds so similar that the contrast was stark (to us, anyway). Jacober is one of the few remaining old-school media people in town, having worked in the same market for 38 years, which Jacober himself noted is a real rarity. But having been around St. Louis sports, especially baseball (his favorite) for so long, he, like Jack Buck, has interwoven his own legacy among our local sports collective memory. After all, who else has first-hand experience of interviewing Harry Caray, shortly after the Cardinal broadcaster was fired, “not sober” at Busch’s Grove with a Schlitz in his hand that he refused to put down during the interview? Jacober told that story and several others, including precious anecdotes about Lou Brock, Bob Gibson and Cool Papa Bell. It was a treat to hear him relate the stories behind the stories, much as the late Bob Broeg used to do.

After Jacober spoke, Cardinal Assistant General Manager John Mozeliak took the floor. We have to confess being most interested in Mozeliak of all the engaging speakers, since his very job deals with so much of what we enjoy writing about on this blog and reading about. As Walt Jocketty’s right-hand man, Mozeliak is primarily in charge of player contracts. From that vantage point, he told the group about the near-miss that was Miguel Batista in much the same way a real-estate agent might speak of nearly buying a property for a client. Moments away from a three-year deal, Mozeliak was on the phone with Batista’s agent, who informed Mozeliak that “Meche is killin’ us.” … When we asked what metrics he likes, and which he doesn’t, Mozeliak wasn’t specific, though he puts some stock in “runs generated and runs prevented” but that stats are merely one component of his equation when projecting a player’s value over the next one to four years, the others being scouting reports and “an intangibles bucket,” which includes feedback from the coaching staff … Still talking to Weaver, or, more specifically, Weaver’s agent, who is apparently “driving that bus” … Thinks the posting process that resulted in the “insane” Dice-K contract for the Red Sox needs to be reviewed … We asked his opinion of the future of arbitration-year buyout contracts for Cardinal pitchers, which we wrote about last week, but Mozeliak thinks it’s too early to be concerned about Reyes and Wainwright, though he mentioned that Yadier Molina could pose an interesting case … His top-five pitchers in the game, off the top of his head? Carp, Santana (when healthy), Oswalt and, “for one game,” Roger Clemens … The younger version of Ben Stein also touched on how the team makes decisions on which player contracts to insure. The line of the day came when Mozeliak was asked just how much authority he had to make deals. He replied without missing a beat, “You don’t send a boy to war.” Well-played, John.

Chapter president Norm Richards introduced Hummel, the latest recipient of the Hall of Fame’s Spink Award honoring sportswriters, to a standing ovation. Hummel spoke of the gratitude he has had for the many people who have congratulated him on his impending induction. Hummel, who has graciously appeared on the Hot Stove speakers’ panel several times, again gave his preview of the upcoming season, along with his fearless predictions for division winners, sticking with tradition and picking the Yankees to win the AL pennant (other division winners: Cardinals, Dodgers, Braves, Tigers, Angels). He also revealed the identity of the main “anonymous source” for his stories in the ’80s, who may come as a surprise, given his nickname … When we asked Hummel what baseball event he wish he could’ve been around to cover, he simply said, “I would like to have talked with Babe Ruth.” Among his real-life greatest coverage moments, he fondly recalled the titillating 1986 NLCS between the Mets and Astros, and the 2003 ALCS, which he also got to cover … We were a bit disappointed in Hummel’s not-surprising answer to our question about whether the Hall of Fame voting should be opened up to other close followers of the game, such as online and television media; The Commish said he thought that “500 or so voters should be enough,” and that the writers were the ones who started it in the first place.

On behalf of the chapter, thanks to all of our speakers and guests who attended, our friends at Mike Shannon’s, and Norm Richards, Rick Salamon and the many other members who helped organize the event. It was another high point on the calendar. The next one, of course, is Spring Training.

Whitey Herzog said of Hub: “Hub Kittle was way past 60, with a face as worn as an old Rawlings mitt by the time he came to the Cardinals as my pitching coach. He’d spent four decades hitting fungoes, steering buses, sleeping in back seats, telling stories of the old days, and sharing the secrets of making a hitter look foolish with a thousand beanpole kids you and I never heard of. Name the place, Hub had been there. God bless guys like him. They are the game.” Also: “I’d see him take an 18-year-old pitcher who couldn’t throw 83 miles an hour off to the side, and ten minutes later the guy’s out on a rubber humming it 88, 89. I can’t even tell you how he did it except to use those five magic words: ‘He was a baseball man.’”

The article will take you down memory lane with some good ’80s Cardinal anecdotes, plus some interesting background tales about Kittle’s earlier life. Good stuff. As for Duncan, we can hear Tony LaRussa, 20 years from now, lauding him in a similar way: “He was a baseball man.”

The big question is how healthy Floyd is. Was his roster spot wasted, or will he be the Kirk Gibson of this NLCS?

The only change from the Mets’ NLDS roster is the speedy defensive wiz Anderson Hernandez in place of young LOOGy Royce Ring.  Indeed, four southpaw relievers would’ve been overkill, especially with two starters being lefty and a Cardinal lineup that has only five possible lefthanded batters.

In addition ta havin’ one o’ the all-time best baseball names, Thrift be most well-known ta Carrdinal fans fer bein’ on the receivin’ end o’ one o’ the most lopsided trades in recent team history. On April 1, 1987, he traded perennial All-Starr catcher Tony Pena ta the Carrdinals, who sent former #1 draft picks Andy Van Slyke ‘n’ Mike Dunne along with Mike LaValliere ta Pittsburgh. In the short-term, it worked out well fer the Carrdinals, whom Pena helped lead ta the World Series in his first season with the club. But over the next few yearrs, the Carrdinals became a second-division team, ‘n’ Pena port departed jumped ship as a free agent after the 1989 season. We’ll always remember Pena fer his wild swings-and-misses that port rendered him twisted ‘n’ kneelin’ on the ground. ARG! Yet fer all o’ his mangy on-base ability ‘n’ proneness ta wild cuts at the dish, he struck out less often than McGee, Pendleton ‘n’ Coleman over the period while he was with the team.

Meanwhile, Van Slyke ‘n’ Lavalliere led the Pirates ta three straight division titles (1990-1992). Van Slyke, who earrned .91 MVP sharres as a Pirate, helped comprise the best outfield in the majors — along with Bobby Bonilla ‘n’ a prresumably prre-rroid Barrry Bonds — but the Carrdinals filled the void with subparr players like Tom Brunansky ‘n’ Milt Thompson. ARR! ARR! I’m two pirates! Perhaps the most prized parrt o’ the deal, Dunne burned out after a stellarr rookie campaign (we still remember his 1988 Topps carrd with the All-Star Rookie cup on it).

So, the final tally, in terms o’ Win Sharres?

A deficit fer the Carrdinals o’ 243 Win Shares. ARR!…I’m not attractive! ‘n’ o’ course a huge surplus fer the Bucs ‘n’ Thrift. It must’ve been one o’ his proudest accomplishments. Avast me hearty mateys!